I recently read in my New York running coach's The Competitive Runner's Handbook that "Yale psychiatry professor Dr. Victor Altshul notes that those who must temporarily give up running go through sequential emotional stages of loss similar to what one might experience with teh death of a loved one." These stages are Denial, Rage, Depression, Acceptance, and Renewed neurotic disequilibrium. For me, there hasn't been a fine line between all of these stages - but I certainly have experienced all of them. This past week, since i've begun my triathlon training program, I jumped head on into that final stage.
"As runners begin to regain fitness, some forget the cause of injuries and neglect the warning signs of further injury. Too often they don't learn from experience and again attempt too much too soon, or train for goals that are beyond their present physical and psychological capacity." Has this guy been following me or something? My picture should be next to this explanation in the book.
Since my 61/2 minute run a week and a half ago, i've made great progress. 2 days after that initial run, I ran for 12 minutes with only minor pain. Then, after a great cycling workout with my triathlon training group, I ran for a total of 15 minutes on the treadmill with no pain at all. Things were looking up. In this past week, following the training program my coach put together for me, I rode close to 50 miles, swam about 1200 meters, lifted for strength training twice this week, worked on my core 3 times this week, as well as the workouts and runs in the 2 physical therapy sessions I had. It was great - I felt alive again and in relatively little pain. In my last PT session, I ran for a complete 10 minute interval and was allowed to attempt a 20 minute interval on my own this weekend - only rule was, if the shooting pain in my ankle came back, I would have to stop.
It all caught up with me this morning as we were completing a physiological test in order to customize our workouts. My hybrid bike wasn't going to cut it for this triathlon, which I knew heading into it - so I bit the bullet and bought a new road bike after my first class. Last Friday I went to get a bike fit (I had no idea how many different ways you can manipulate a bike to make it fit your body). This morning was the first time I would clip in on my new bike for a workout.
So i'm all excited- I have my new computer in my new bike with my new shoes, and I start warming up. I'm still learning to play with the gears - I had been used to a number display to tell me what gear I was in and this bike I just looked down to see what gear I was in. My butt was a little sore and I was getting used to being in a different position now - learning forward as oppossed to being more straight up. My quads felt a little sore, even in the warmup. Then it came time for the test - we had to bike with hard effort for 3 miles - to measure our watts, mph, etc. This information would be used to compile data broken into different training zones for each person.
30 seconds into this test, my legs are burning something fierce. I'm lagging behind everyone in the group (little riders were simulating us on the large computer screen - measuring all this data, telling us how much further we had to go). Most people where averaging 20 mph - I was going 15 - and struggling to go any faster. Their wattage was around 200 - mine was in the 120s. But I still was in a higher cadence of about 95 RPM the whole time - even going up to 100. I really couldn't pedal any faster. I was in too light of a gear, but my legs were completely shot from my lower body workout the day before - it was all that I had in me.
I realized I had screwed up - I didn't entirely stick to the training plan my coach gave me for the week. I did everything he asked - but I switched around some of the days and added strength training and some running in PT to the mix. Doing all this, so suddenly - from being practically sedentary for close to 3 months followed by all this activity and effort in a week - it caught up with me. After a 10 minute rest, our coach wanted us to do the test again - this time I switched to a higher gear. It was awful - so much pain - he told me to switch to a lighter gear - but it was too late. I had already gone into muscle failure. I was pushing and pulling and pointing my toes - anything I could to get the pedal around. I felt uneven - my body was moving around too much which is an indication I need to work on my core. Being clipped into the pedal was a new sensation, especially both pushing and pulling to get around as oppossed to only pushing. 2 miles into this second test - that shooting pain in my foot and left ankle appeared. I told my coach I had to stop - too much pain.
I felt stupid - I felt like a failure. I've been so anxious to get back on track and so frustrated that i'm not at the level I used to be. My coach is a very nice, calm, knowledgable pro triathlete. But he was very concernced with this and frankly, he was probably annoyed with me that I wasn't completely listening to him. So I went home, feeling just awful. I called Lee, and he straightened me out. I was concerned that I was so far behind the group - and he yelled at me saying doing lower body weights 12 hours beforehand was the worst thing I could have done. I have to halt weight training all together - the cycling and running will be enough. Otherwise, this sort of thing happens. He was preaching patience- just like my coach was - just like my physical therapist and Dr. Altshul (above) was. I'm too anxious and am not really thinking of the consequences. So, before I left, I talked to my coach, and we decided I needed to take Monday off from training to recover. Then I have to call him Tuesday to work out a new plan - and I plan on apologizing to him. I'm not sure how good the data he collected on me was - because it was a bad day not indicative of what i'm capable of at this point. Fortunately - I have time on my side. Over 4 months to the Tri - so stay tuned...
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